9780061953668
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Bite Me audiobook

  • By: Christopher Moore
  • Narrator: Susan Bennett
  • Length: 8 hours 3 minutes
  • Publisher: HarperAudio
  • Publish date: March 23, 2010
  • Language: English
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(25600 ratings)
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Bite Me Audiobook Summary

“Christopher Moore is a very sick man, in the very best sense of the word.”

–Carl Hiaasen

The undead rise again in Bite Me, the third book in New York Times bestselling author Christopher Moore’s wonderfully twisted vampire saga. Joining his farcical gems Bloodsucking Fiends and You Suck, Moore’s latest in continuing story of young, urban, nosferatu style love, is no Twilight–but rather a tsunami of the irresistible outrageousness that has earned him the appellation, “Stephen King with a whoopee cushion and a double-espresso imagination” from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution and inspired Denver’s Rocky Mountain News to declare him, “the 21st century’s best satirist.”

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Bite Me Audiobook Narrator

Susan Bennett is the narrator of Bite Me audiobook that was written by Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore is the author of seventeen previous novels, including Shakespeare for SquirrelsNoirSecondhand Souls, Sacre Bleu, Fool, and Lamb. He lives in San Francisco, California.

About the Author(s) of Bite Me

Christopher Moore is the author of Bite Me

Bite Me Full Details

Narrator Susan Bennett
Length 8 hours 3 minutes
Author Christopher Moore
Publisher HarperAudio
Release date March 23, 2010
ISBN 9780061953668

Additional info

The publisher of the Bite Me is HarperAudio. The imprint is HarperAudio. It is supplied by HarperAudio. The ISBN-13 is 9780061953668.

Global Availability

This book is only available in the United States.

Goodreads Reviews

Matthew

November 12, 2016

Kind of embarrassing . . . I needed an audiobook to read and found this on Hoopla. Since I have read other Christopher Moore, I figured I would give it a go. Part way through and loving it, I went to add it to "currently reading" on Goodreads and discovered it is book three of a series. I was wondering why the first 20 minutes of it or so seemed like a recap . . .So, I might go back someday and read the first two, but this one seemed to do pretty good on its own. I enjoyed the characters and the humor. I was fully entertained for the entirety of the book.I feel I can safely say, even without without having read the first two, that if you like vampire stories and you like humor, you will probably enjoy this.

Calista

October 11, 2018

Abby could be one of my favorite characters in literature! My first exposure to Christopher Moore was Lamb (his irreverent, but funny take on the life of Jesus) and this was my 2nd book by Moore which sealed the deal. It is about Vampires and it is the last in a 3 book series. Still, it was the first one I read. The setting is San Francisco. There are Vampires in the city and Christopher's zany cast of characters abound. I like the emperor with his dogs. They show up in several series. Abby is a goth girl who can spin the word f*ck more often and more creatively than anyone I've ever seen. I do love a person who can curse with such abandon and so naturally. She is terrible to men. She wants them to lust after her and slaps them for doing so. She is perhaps the funniest character out there. I have read that Christopher is not going to write more stories with her, but I sure wish he would. She is amazing. Abby works for the Vampires. She hangs out in this cool goth club I would have gone to in my 20s where people dress up like goths and vampires. It's simply brilliant and Christopher Moore is one messed up funny man. I love his stories. His stories also make me wish it was affordable to live in San Francisco as that is one of my favorite places in this world. It's a place so liberal I look like a moderate there. Maybe my next life I can live in San Fran. The city is it's own character in this book. Christopher's work is some of the funniest stuff out there to me. He is irreverent , sarcastic, and nothing is off limits. He pokes fun at everyone. This was my gateway drug into this world. Since it's the season, I thought I would put in a real review for this some 8 years later.

Lea

June 25, 2012

I love the cover. And the insults (and pretty much all of the colorful language). And the irreverent, doesn't take itself seriously at all humor. I'll have to read more by Moore.

Lyric

April 06, 2010

While I absolutely love Abby Normal, and was very excited to have another tale narrated almost entirely by her, this did not quite live up to the standard set by 'You Suck'.Was it funny as fuck? Of course. All Christopher Moore novels are. Did it feature a lot of well loved familiar faces? Certainly. Could it slap the crap out of 'Twilight' and leave it crying like the little bitch that it is, on the playground after school? You bet my sweet shapely behind it could.But, something about this just fell short. And I think that might be because it was...too short. A lot happens in this book to really tie up all of the loose ends in the saga of Tommy and Jody (and Elijah and Abby and Jared and Foo and the Animals), but it all happens perhaps a little too quickly and easily in 310 approximately 5x7" pages. And despite my great love for her, the major shortcoming of the story may actually be that so much of it was Abby. Moore would have done well to spend more time with Chet, perpetrator of the vampyre kitty pandemic. Why didn't we get more scenes with Chet trying to hump things? Wasn't that supposed to be the love story bit?

Kate

April 23, 2010

I heart Abby Normal (which of course is not her real name but the one she gave herself after watching "Young Frankenstein") However, she is the most bad-ass teenager that has ever been turned into a Nossssss-fratu as well as the most comical of them all. Why do I like her so much, well let me give you a glimpse into her crazy goth, emo, punk rock head:I came leaping out into the living area, my claws ready to rend flesh and kick ass.And I was all, "Rawr!"And who do I see there but the vampyre Flood, my most recently escaped master gone mad, who has never even seen me in this outfit, let alone as a vamp.So I was all "Rawr! Fear Me!"And he was all, "That's not a thing. Saying "rawr" is not a vampyre thing."And I'm like, "It is too. I'm totally showing my animal power and fierceness."Of course the argument goes on from there until Abby has exhausted Flood and he's all like fine you win because you know what, Abby always wins. She's witty, hilarious and ok maybe a bit annoying, but you know what that's why I like her. Plus, her most awesome-haired mad scientist love interest "The Notorious Foo Dog" is awesome in his own way because he is able to put up with her and actually even likes her crazy ways, but probably wouldn't admit it to anyone ever. However, to understand the bigger picture and how Abigail Von Normal, Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area fits in, you should probably start at the beginning with Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story then read You Suck before even thinking about picking up this lovely lively tale, but that's just my personal opinion and you don't have to listen to me if you don't want to.

AH

June 28, 2010

Where do I start? I have not laughed so hard since I read the first book in the series, Bloodsucking Fiends. I hadn't even realized that Bite Me was part of a trilogy and that this was the third book in the series. It really didn't matter that I read the books out of order.What makes this book special is the attention to all of the zany, eccentric, and absolutely crazy characters. You have humans, and all sorts of vampires -- vampire cats, rats, and parrots. The humans in Bite Me include a homeless man that calls himself the Emperor of San Francisco, 2 police officers, and the Animals who work the night shift restocking the local Safeway. Special mention goes to Abigail von Normal or Abby Normal, a teenage nosferatu wannabe. Most of the book is told from her point of view, in her chronicles. There are plenty of vampires to keep us entertained. Chet the shaved vampire cat is a force to be reckoned with. Because of Chet, there are hordes of vampire kitties stalking and killing in the streets of San Francisco. There are even vampire parrots, but they were not smart enough to stay out of the sun, so they burned up. Abby's boyfriend, Steve, experiments and creates a lot of vampire rats. Mayhem ensues... and there are new uses for shop/vacs.Christopher Moore's writing style is witty, understated, comical and fun. He varies the point of view, putting the reader into each character's mind, with hilarious results. He captures Abby's teen-speak very well. Chapter 2 was completely unexpected, a test on Chapter 1.I recommend this book to anyone who needs some comic relief and vampires in one book. It's a lot of fun.

David

July 16, 2010

For Halloween this year, I went as a bad standup-comedian vampire. I wrote some jokes that followed typical standup subject matter but entirely without punch lines. My style was Steven Wright minus the payoff. I dressed as a vampire, wore realistic fangs, too, and performed the routine at two parties with a plant in the audience each time directed to shout, after four jokes, “You suck!!!”I killed.Hahahah. Well, I kill me, anyway.So a while back a friend loaned me the novel, You Suck because he said it was hilarious. When I realized it was part two of a trilogy, the OCD completist in me couldn’t read it without buying part one Bloodsucking Fiends and part three Bite Me . This review will cover all three installments.All three books have a delightfully whimsical, campy quality. Occasionally, there are moments of pseudo-profound introspection, but these are some of the least satisfying elements in the books. The Vampire Trilogy, as Moore calls it, at its finest puts a few hilarious characters in embarrassing situations. And he’s got some brilliant lines sprinkled throughout to season the meal. Bloodsucking Fiends is by far the least funny and least satisfying of the three. I would describe it as fun without being all that funny. There were several plot twists, especially toward the end, that were quite unconvincing. I also found one of the two main characters, the 19-year old writer wannabe, to be rather annoying and far too naïve-country-boy-comes-to-big-city while the other main character was a bit too bland. Nonetheless, Moore sustained my interest through a barreling plot and amusing characters. I was definitely a bit disappointed and almost didn’t continue, but the OCD side took control, and I’m glad it did. You Suck upped the hilarity quotient exceedingly through the introduction of two characters of comedic brilliance, the sick-and-twisted, uber-snarky goth girl Abby Normal (I wonder if Moore stole that name from Young Frankenstein. Or more accurately, did the character steal it because her “real” name is Allison Green while Abigail von Normal is her goth name) and her gay goth bff Jared. Apparently, Abby has a small role in one of Moore’s other novels, but she becomes much more significant in You Suck , and Bite Me is really more of her novel than the two hero vampires, Tommy and Jody. Good call, I say. because she is way damn funnier and smarter than either of them. She really steals the show with her wit and attitude. I could read Abby Normal all day.I wouldn’t be surprised to see these novels as movies some day. The late-shift supermarket stockers/vampire-hunting stoners featured practically beg for a screenplay to be written for them. And surely some starlet needs to be Abby Normal in order to break from her goody-two-shoes casting. And plus … vampires. Nobody’s done a good vampire comedy since Love at First … okay, since ever. This could work.Occasionally, the plot seems to get away from Moore and it requires more exposition than it should, but when he focuses on character, the story kills. Overall, worth reading … good comedy is bloody hard to do.

Jackie

January 17, 2010

Forget Stephanie Meyer, THESE are the vampires you want to hang out with because they will make you laugh constantly. This is a fang-filled, free-for-all festival of sex, vampire cats, fringe science and teenage minion angst. It picks up where "You Suck" left off without missing a beat and it is of course full of Moore's stylistic raunchy humor that has made him a superstar to the slightly twisted reader like myself. FANGtastic read with a surprise ending--don't miss it!

Edwina

January 11, 2018

This book is rip-roarin' hilarious!A *must read* for fans of Christopher Moore.

Littlefox

July 03, 2010

Classic Christopher Moore,For those of you that have not had the pleasure, Classic Christopher Moore = Laugh out loud funny/campy/and at times (more othen then most red-blooded men will admit)very touching. If you can find fault in this book or any one (Even Fluke)of his books you really need to lighten up, life is short so, Laugh Damn It Laugh. All Jokes aside this is one of his best I hated the ending and still think it is a great read. Way to go Christopher... you knocked another one out of the park.

Jessica

August 02, 2020

Funny stuff! I definitely found this funnier than book 2 in the series.This book was a very satisfying ending to the trilogy. I mean a pack of vampire cats wreaking havoc on San Francisco...what's not to love?!?What to listen to while reading...Vampire Girl by Valerie RichmanWe Only Come out at Night by The Smashing PumpkinsThe Lovecats by The CureVampires by Bat for LashesDead Inside by Muse

E.

February 11, 2016

I'm kind of sad to close this series, so many great characters ending. The cool part was this audiobook was narrated by Siri (Susan Bennett) and she totally rocked Abby Normal. I will listen to this again some day when I need a laugh.

Mauoijenn

November 18, 2014

Vampire cats?Why yes, yes thank you!Such a great book.Another home run for Moore.

Charlie

July 02, 2017

There were times where I thought my brain was melting from listening to this audiobook. But Foo's simultaneously inexplicable but relatable love for Abby mirrors my inexplicable but relatable love for this book.

Andre 🌙

July 31, 2021

Es un cachondeo. Es como si tu amiga la otaku gótica te contara un drama cualquiera. Mezcla súper gracioso lo de ser vampiro con ser adolescente/persona de ventipocos (?) no es un drama como crepúsculo o algo así. Me parece súper soft la dinámica q tienen cuando se convierten en niebla y el final es súper wholesome. A veces se hacía un poco pesado cuando lo narraban los adultos pero Emberdá se compensa con las partes graciosas. Lectura ligerita de no pensar en nada lo recomiendo.

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