But You Seemed So Happy audiobook

Please, allow me to go first.

But You Seemed So Happy is a memoir in the form of essays about every aspect of marriage and divorce. After Kimberly and her husband decide to get a divorce they make the decision to live in the same home together but as single people. Kimberly Harrington reflects on how the couple lived together but separately, and how they raised their children together as a united family. I am a seasoned veteran when it comes to long-term relationships. I've been with the same person the majority of my life (married for 16 years) and even though we are still together, I still found this book very relatable. I feel like this book would be relatable to anyone that's ever been in a long-term relationship(married or not). But You Seemed So Happy is one of the most honest nonfiction books about relationships that I've ever read. Not only does this book uncover the raw truths of marriage/relationships but it is absolutely hilarious! Filled with dark satire, I found myself laughing out loud at several points. I loved reading about Kimberly and her family's journey. I enjoyed reading how they made something positive out of a negative situation. I would highly recommend this book for anyone looking for a nonfiction story that's highly relateable(no matter what season your relationship is in). I look forward to reading anything that Kimberly Harrington writes in the future. A massive thanks to Harper Perennial for the gifted copy!

Here I am, 26, married—— relating to this so much more than is comfortable. I especially appreciated the dedication. An insightful read filled with empathy and compassion that is lacking in discourse about divorce.

In her second collection of essays as a memoir, Kimberly Harrington gives us a unique and intimate look at the dissolution of her marriage during quarantine. She creates unflinching, humbling, and hilarious writings on what it was like to try and split up with someone you have lived with for over 20 years while being forced to share the same house. Having been through a divorce, I could not imagine living under the same roof. This book was so sharp and witty, showing a funny frustration. I loved one part where the author skewers “well-meaning” people who never say the right thing. It was so scathing but accurate. The author wrote about one of her responses: "This is amazing. What are the odds? Here I was struggling for years navigating the disintegration of one of the most foundational and, dare I say, private relationships of my life, a relationship, in fact, that has lasted almost the entirety of my adulthood, which is an interesting contrast to my relationship with you, a person whom I have spoken with twice. How I had never thought to consult you, peripheral nobody, for advice is beyond me. Thank goodness you are such a warrior for the sanctity of marriage that you stepped boldly over the line of polite discourse to insert yourself into this intimate, intimate area of my life. You are certainly brave and a person who is not reading my social cues right now. Again, I am overcome with gratitude. Thanks."To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at: https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/kim...

Let me start by saying that this book is not necessarily a literary masterpiece, but that’s also not what I was looking for. I was intrigued to read a book about marriage and divorce after having gone through both myself a little over a decade ago. While I do not agree with the author on all of her stances regarding the institution of marriage, relationships, or even some of her thoughts on dating, this book was at times for me laugh out loud funny, so intuitive I thought “oh you too have been there”, bittersweet and agonizing at other times. In other words, it was real. I didn’t go through my divorce at the same age as the author. It was not necessarily amicable, and it took us many years to decide how to parent the children together, many years where I mostly parented on my own, with the much-needed help of my parents and extended family, and even with help from friends. The relationship with my ex husband/father of my children has changed many times through the years. We are now friends, we now share custody. It is not always friendly even to this day. There is still bittersweet resentment hiding underneath the edges at times, a reminder of the sweet stench of decay…I really enjoyed that the author did not couch everything in devastating terms. I love that she talked about the beauty that was once her relationship. We don’t all get married to end up divorced for sure. Also though, divorce is labeled as such a failure and I thought some of her ideas while not 100% my beliefs were enlightening and refreshing. I laughed out loud and read my now and wonderful husband, lines from her about dating as an adult, using matchmaking apps, feeling the need to be with another person. Funny, but also so, so true in many ways. At age 28 I was even more the “divorce witch” -friends with husbands weren’t always available anymore, where I was warned by the Christian institution I worked for at the time not to date publicly as I was at a very “available” age and didn’t want to send the wrong message to my high school students, etc, etc. because an available woman is SCARY. Overall I really, really enjoyed this book and flew through it.

I am unsettled. It was an interesting read, but I feel like we are missing something here. But it might be that I would leave out parts of my story too if I was to share it.

I received this book in a Goodreads giveaway. As everyone else has said, this is a very honest view of the author’s divorce and marriage/divorce in general. I’ve been through divorce twice myself. I’ve had many of the same thoughts about my own marriages, the second one especially. Sometimes I felt bad for her husband as he seemed blindsided but then I thought maybe he was aware of their issues but chose to ignore things. I will admit, I was a little angry with the author when she spoke about how she left the care of her first two dogs to her husband. I am an animal lover and I adopted my animals knowing I was accepting responsibility for them just as I would take care of my children. I have dealt with sick and elderly pets while taking care of infant twins and never even thought about shoving off their care to my husband. I felt she was a bit selfish in doing that.That being said, I think this is a good read and people may find this book helpful if they are going through some of the same things in their life.

3.5 rounded up!Divorced or not, I think each reader can find something to take away from this book. Is it perfect? No, but that’s exactly what Harrington was going for. I appreciated her honest take on her life and acknowledging how her divorce would differ from others.It was a good read filled with dry humor (my favorite) and an open reflection on her experiences. She also taps into marriage in general, what society expects of married couples, and what transpired after getting a divorce. Somewhere in the middle the message got a little fuzzy, but the ending pulled it back on track.When a relationship is no longer salvageable, there is truly no easy solution or conclusion written within a marriage manual. To reiterate from earlier in my review, I really appreciated the attempt at honest reflection since divorce still seems like such a taboo topic.Content warnings: miscarriage, animal death, divorce

Compulsively readable (to me) essays about romance, expectations, marriage, separation, divorce, and estrangement. Kimberly Harrington's parents were young when they got married and had her fairly quickly. Harrington felt that her parents either didn't want her or cooled on the notion of parenting early in her life. And that not-wantedness or not-wanted-enoughness has stuck with her throughout her life so far. Despite all her accomplishments and successes and good qualities, she has felt unappreciated. My friend who is a divorce lawyer (sorry, I mean a family law attorney) tells me that she works with her clients when they are not at their best—when they are at a low point in their lives. Harrington wrote this book during a two-year period when she was separated but not divorced. So that low point seems to taint many of her recollections going back to childhood. Harrington's first book was about motherhood, and the second one is about separation and preparing for divorce. I wonder if the third one will be about life after divorce. Be warned: The author relies heavily on rhetorical questions. One essay is nothing but rhetorical questions.

You don’t need to be married or divorced to relate to her story. It somehow made me laugh and bawl my eyes out just in the span of a few pages. Such a beautiful book

I loved this book. Whenever I read Harrington’s writing (books or essays or Twitter updates), I wish I knew her personally. She seems like someone I’d like to be friends with. Even if you've never been married, or if you're married but have never contemplated divorce, there is value to be found in this book. Some people, like Harrington, are such good writers that it’s easy to relate to them because of the way they describe their lives.I also like how she structured the book: short essays, long essays, some humorous, some serious.Sometimes I want books to be shorter so I can be done with them; I wished this one was longer.

Just finished this book. Well, wow. It was funny, sad, smart, heartbreaking and hopeful. It was REAL. I couldn’t put it down and anxiously waited to see what would unfold next.Struggling in a marriage that has lost its affection and appreciation is difficult. Waiting to be loved is much more important than being in a loveless marriage. Seriously, this book haunts me. I keep thinking about all that was shared and the words were perfect. Lent it to a friend who’s going through a break from her husband. No money to live in separate homes so they’re nesting. She was excited about the book and loved it. The author deserved that 20th anniversary party, and deserves to have someone completely in love with her.Thanks for writing the book and sharing so much!

If I go could give this 10 stars, I would. I laughed and cried through this book and it was so relatable, in hundreds of ways.

Thank you to Harper for the ARC! (Have I mentioned being a bookseller is full of delightful perks??)An honest portrait of a marriage and divorce. An insightful, witty, heartbreaking memoir told in essays. Kudos to Harrington for not using the phrase "conscious uncoupling" even once even though her divorce is perhaps the most fitting and deserving of that concept. I don't think you necessarily need to have been married and/or divorced to appreciate the writing, but it may help. I downed this in three days.Several sentences I loved:"It's never too early to believe you deserve the world's attention simply for being you." (pg. 17)"No one goes into this thinking choosing a violent fuckup is a super idea." (pg. 76)"No! Cast not your lustful eye upon my husband, Divorce Witch!" they'd cry if she even looked in the general zip code of their husbands. And Divorce Witch would think, 'Bitch, your husband? LOL. That guy sucks. (pg. 179) This actually made me burst out laughing on the bus like a loon."What was the future anyway, other than specific wishes, pinned on a grid that owed us nothing?" (pg. 251)

This memoir significantly expanded my worldview about marriage and divorce, and I cherish Harrington for her honesty and vulnerability. Some of my favorite parts:- "None of us will ever truly know the people we think we know so well. Our best friends. Our siblings. Our parents. Our partners. People are fundamentally unknowable. Even our children, people we have made. When all is said and done, we tell ourselves a story about who we think we are. We tell ourselves a story about who we think other people are. Their flaws, their motivations, their innermost thoughts and desires. We prefer our versions. We understand our versions. But all that aside, what we all have in common is this: Please see me, please care about me."- "Children are the undeniable markers of time. We can see not only year-to-year but sometimes day-to-day that time will swallow us all whole. We wonder if we are making the most of it now. We wonder what we would do differently then. We often think the time for action is in the future, when we will surely get it right. And then we arrive at the allotted time realizing we have done so little of what we had set out to do. We were so sure we would. But the years had somehow grown shorter, they shot by faster, and now we feel haunted by everything we left undone."- "People will keep falling in love, they will keep getting married, and they will keep having kids. And you can tell people all you want about everything that could go wrong but no one will listen. You wouldn’t have listened. What did it have to do with you?"