Passages in Caregiving audiobook

Someone gave me this book about five years ago and I just wasn’t ready for it then. My dad and I were already in a daily caregiving situation with my mom, but I didn’t want to read about that while I was mentally and emotionally consumed by it. I wasn’t in denial about things; I knew we were in the shit and we had work to focus on and do. In my brief times of rest from caregiving, the last thing I wanted to do was read and reflect on the devastatingly sad state of my role as caregiving only-child daughter. But books are patient and they wait for you to be ready. For that, I am grateful... I don’t even remember why I picked it up recently. Pretty sure it was in a random pile on the floor of my home office (where I keep lots of books, just shut up). But I found it, again. And this time, I was ready to read it. And it has helped me where I’m at right now in my role as caregiver and daughter. It has also helped me feel comfortable and ready to think about my own future of aging and life quality. It’s a beautifully written narrative and personal story. Sort of like a kind, encouraging support group in a book. I’m glad this book waited for me.

I prospered emotionally from reading this book. I am currently in the midst of caring for my mother and immersed in much of the same turmoil and chaos that Sheehy illustrates. By identifying these issues and finding that I am not alone in my conflicting feelings was extremely enlightening. This book also was worth it's weight in gold for the simple reason of passing on these 2 words...UNSAFE DISCHARGE. Sheehy exposes the issue of patients discharged from hospitals that ethically, legally and clinically should not be. It is a hidden factor in hospitals; many patients are discharged due to financial reasons. Doctors are forced and encouraged to do this. Nurses encounter moral and ethical dilemmas. Sheehy lets the cat out of the bag. These 2 words can force a doctor or hospital administration to back down and re-evaluate the situation. This book can be frustrating in that Sheehy is quite wealthy and had means to care for her husband that most people don't. There is not way I can afford nursing care for my mother 24 hours a day. However, she does empathize and address that issue.Definitely worth reading. Lots of insight and details on thessue of caregiving.

Sheehy kept journals during the 17 years her husband needed care. They were a busy couple, keeping residences in Berkeley (his job), N.Y.C. (her job), eastern Long Island (family get-away) and she commuted cross country as needed. She gives a straightforward account of emotions, solutions, searching for care, warning what insurance and Medicare will and will not pay for, palliative care when Hospice is not yet an option. I gave this four stars because I was a caregiver and needed her message "turning chaos into confidence."

I have not made my way completely through this book. That said, it is clear that this is one highly useful book in the world of caregiving and all that this entails. Chock full of pragmatic and specific advice for the act of caregiving, but also full of empathy about the changed lives of caregivers. This is one of those books people will consult when they find themselves in the middle of a crisis.

Gail Sheehy does an amazing job of breaking down caregiving into eight stages and offering insights and advice for each stage. She was a caregiver to her husband for over 11 years and shares poignant tales from her experience.The book closes with Do's and Don'ts for the caregiver which are very helpful.

HELP WANTED! Untrained family member or friend to act as advocate, researcher, care manager,and emotional support for a parent or spouse,sibling or friend,who has been diagnosed with a serious illness or chronic disability. Duties: Make medical decisions, negotiate with insurance companies or Medicare; pay bills; legal work; personal care and entertainment in hospital and rehab. Aftercare at home: Substitute for skilled nurse if injections, IV, oxygen, wound care or tube feedings are required. Long-term care: Medication management, showering, toileting, lifting, transporting, etc. Hours: On demand. Salary and benefits: 0.This appears on the second page of Chapter 1 of Gail Sheehy's PASSAGES IN CAREGIVING. She spend the remainder of the book into fulfilling the second part of the title: TURNING CHAOS INTO CONFIDENCE. Based on her personal experiences while caring for her husband for seventeen years, she describes eight turnings that people in caregiving situations experience: Shock and Mobilization (Advocate with Authority); The New Normal (Turn Illness into Opportunity), Boomerang (Summon a Family Meeting), Playing God (Accept What You Cannot Change), "I Can't Do This Anymore!" (Create a Circle of Care), Coming Back (Replenish Your Lifelines), The In-Between Stage (Prepare Your Own Path to Comeback), and The Long Good-Bye (Love is Letting Go, Together). Each section provides not only a description of the stage and a diary of what she and her husband experienced, she talks about other people's experiences and provides very helpful strategies, including resources, for getting through them.This book is written for the lay person who is trying to find their way through a difficult situation. It lets readers know they are not alone and gives them the tools the easy their burden. While not everyone will have all the experiences or go through all the stages, sometimes the end comes too quickly), there are suggestions that can help whatever stage you and the person for whom you are caring at currently dealing with. My only suggestion would be to change the last part of the job description. There are immense benefits in being able to care for someone during the difficult periods of caring for them. This book makes the journey less difficult.

I truly think that you cannot grapple with the issues of caregiving until it becomes your role. I am not in that place, though I can see the day coming. I am sure that I will return to this book when I need the help and support -- and practical advice -- it offers.Whatever book I read, I find that I take away at least one useful or memorable bit of information. In this Passages book, I was riveted by the chapter on the beneficial effect that creating art can have on dementia patients. I had never thought about that. There is so much a dementia patient cannot do that requires memory and complex step-taking -- like reading or crocheting or quilting -- and I've been casting around for meaningful activities to engage a person in. I am thinking about how to implement this in my family.Then, of course, I was interested in Gail Sheehy's own story of her husband's illness and their life after his cancer diagnosis. It is always the personal story that draws me in, and from which I take the most lasting lessons. Hers is a journey many of us will travel, and she's a reassuring and practical tour guide.

As everyone will find themselves as caregiver to a parent or spouse at some point, this book is a comprehensive guide to every stage that can occur. Presented thru her own personal experience as caregiver to her husband, Gail Sheehy provides learnings, insights, advice on how to work around and thru sytems and an amazing list of resources for both patient and caregiver. A guide every mid-life individual should own.

Full of wonderful caregiver help that I learned the hard way, through experience. This is a book anyone with a parent needs to have ready on their bookshelf. In fact, read it while you are young so you'll be better prepared to pick up the heavy load once it's yours.