Hate to Want You audiobook

“Ten years is long enough for me to be hung up on a man who hates to want me. Who I can’t seem to hate enough to stop wanting.” This was a damn treat to read. One of my favorite second chance romances of all time. Never have I ever read such a sexy book, that constantly emphasizes the importance (and sexiness) of consent! On top of the fact that this book has some amazing diversity from most of the cast of characters, but it also showcases an Asian main character who is living with her depression and who loves her soft body completely and unapologetically. I loved this. Absolutely loved this. And I completely recommend this to every romance reader.Hate to Want You switches between two perspectives:➽ Nicholas - In line to own his family’s empire, while working constantly.➽ Livvy - Tattoo artist who won’t stay in one city for too long. “Love rarely conquered all, the true villains almost always went unpunished, and happily ever afters? Ha. Sometimes all you could hope for were secret stolen moments with one messy, royally bad girl.” And their lives have been intertwined forever, since their family used to co-own a business. Key word: used to. After a tragedy, that business relationship fell apart, so Nicholas and Livvy’s relationship fell apart, too. Yet, every ten years, on Livvy’s birthday, she will text Nicholas coordinates to meet her in a different city. And he always comes. And they always have mind-blowing sex. Except, last birthday, Livvy’s thirtieth birthday, which would have marked ten years since Nicholas started traveling each and every year to find her, she didn’t send a text. But now she’s back in town, staying with her mother, in the city where Nicholas and her grew up and fell in love. And Nicholas is not only curious why she didn’t text him, but he’s also trying to keep his emotions in check. “How can I be with anyone else when I spend three hundred and sixty-four days waiting for you to draw me a map?” And Nicholas and Livvy’s families are heavily connected. Like, generations back connected. And throughout the story we slowly get to see what drove them apart ten years ago, while also focusing on everything that is still keeping them apart. You all, it was refreshing to read about people actually older than me for once in a romance novel! Seriously, I’ve been feeling in kind of a funk about my age and reading lately, and this was a breath of fresh air! The media we consume just makes us feel like we should be married, in our dream homes, with kids, in our late twenties. Then this beautiful and actually realistic story comes along, and it was the perfect thing that me and my head space needed. “The world was unkind to women. It was devastating to women who didn’t believe in themselves.” This was the most seamlessly woven feminist romance novel I’ve ever read, too. And I honestly feel like I’m going to rate all romance reads off of this one book. I always add little caveats for my erotic reads, about how I rate them differently, because so many of the themes are so unhealthy, toxic, and problematic, but now I understand that’s just bad and lazy writing. Alisha Rai wrote this beautiful, powerful, sexy as hell, feministic book that didn’t have any of those unhealthy elements that I’ve come to expect. I was proud to finish this book, and this author has now set the bar for me, and I’m not looking back. “I read this article once that said the quickest way to get a dude to stop hitting on you was to say that you’re with another guy, because men respect other men more than they respect a woman saying no.” This was honestly pure joy to read. It was so fast paced, so intriguing, so sexy, so powerful. The representation was beyond words amazing. The themes were important and so very appreciated. And the story was great. I can’t wait to read every single thing Alisha Rai has created. Don’t sleep on this one, lovelies. Blog | Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram | Youtube | Twitch Buddy Read with Taryn & Paloma! ❤

I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.Growing up as the pseduo prince and princess of their families, it was almost inevitable that Nicholas and Livvy would end up together. However, their world gets shattered when tragedy strikes and they find themselves ripped apart.Ten years later and Livvy is back home to take care of her mother and maybe get back some of what was lost to her.Nicholas wants something too, more than one night a year. First in the new Forbidden Hearts series, Hate to Want You lends itself to the easy comparison to Romeo and Juliet. We have two families brought together by hard work and determinism, only to be broken apart two generations later by hurt, innuendo, secrets, and pain. Our couple's grandfathers started a grocery store that has been built up over the years to develop into a chain. When the heroine's father and the hero's mother are killed in a car accident together, painful questions are raised. Then the hero's father does some suspiciously underhanded dealings to buy heroine's family half of the grocery chain. Thus, begins the cold war between the families and the fracturing of Livvy and Nicholas' romance.   In terms of pure pleasure and relief, he imagined the feeling he got when he received a text from Livvy was similar to what an addict felt when they got a hit of whatever drug they craved.  We are started off with Nicholas' point of view and what a deep emotional start it was. We learn that on Livvy's birthday she texts him her coordinates, he travels to her, and they have sex for that one night a year. Except she didn't do it this year and he finds out she is in town where she hasn't stepped foot in ten years. Our first look at the couple is so filled with emotion and sexual tension, you'll be hooked. Nicholas starts off as the brighter focus of the two with his barely contained torment, weight of struggling to take care of the business and his family, and inability to stop craving Livvy. There is a tiny little bit of martyr syndrome to him, but ultimately, his character and heart was wonderful to read.  All those years ago, she'd lost her father to death, her mother to grief, her brothers to hate. And then she'd lost him.  While I thought Nicholas started off with a stronger spotlight, Livvy grows brighter and brighter with each new insight to her character. Livvy was such an amazing look at strengths and weaknesses that were laid bare with inner struggles that were a painful beauty to behold. Her struggle to try and manage her feelings to what she thinks is acceptable and still respect her herself had so much depth. We also learn of a very real struggle she deals with, I loved how the author didn't use to define her but showed how she is in some ways fashioned from it. Our heroines don't always get to be everything; Livvy was a fantastic multi-faceted woman. There is no way I can do justice in relaying to you the complete picture of story and characters Alisha Rai gives us. The family dynamics going on here were tremendously done, with the emotions feeling real and raw. There's obviously more to be discovered about the instances that tore these two families apart, the introduction to the secondary characters that are connected by these story threads will have you dying to get the complete picture. Nicholas and Livvy's siblings aren't thrown out there as series bait but rather fill out the complete story; I'm salivating for their stories (Put me on team pairing up Eve and Gabe!).  Now, this has more intense sexual talk and scenes than your average contemporary, you could probably put an erotica tag on it. They are gritty, raw, and of course sexual with the author not shying away from pearl clutching language. I would argue though, that what makes them feel so raw are the deep emotion between Livvy and Nicholas, but look, the spanking and hair pulling also helps. What I personally loved about their sex scenes were the powerful dynamics happening. There's a blowjob scene where Nicholas is the more vulnerable participant, even while physically we know he's the more powerful, he's shown to be incredibly emotionally vulnerable. There's been a little bit of a trend to portray "Me Tarzan, you Jane" sex, the power and emotion dynamics sex scenes here blow those depictions out of the water for me. I was a huge fan of what felt more like consensual and emotionally balanced sex. What I'm trying to say, is spanking and hair pulling sex scenes can be amazing when you add depth of emotion. The hint of humor and lightness between our couple, which gets bogged down sometimes from the pain and circumstances, also plays a big part here, even if regulated to the edges. Deep, emotional, raw, and hot, Hate to Want You is an incredible lovers-to-enemies-to-lovers romance. Nicholas and Livvy's desire and love for one another is the stuff of Shakespearean plays. Alisha Rai has set up a series with a world and characters that I can't wait to return to and read about.   "You're not my secret anymore. My love for you is bigger than anyone who might try to tear us apart." He paused. "I won't leave you, Livvy. You don't have to trust me completely right now, but watch me. Watch me fight for you this time."  

Smutathon Challenge #1 : Enemies To LoversFull review postedAnd it was so good, I think I discovered a new favorite romance author. Ten years is long enough for me to be hung up on a man who hates to want me. Who I can’t seem to hate enough to stop wanting. Hate to want you was a great surprise for me, My first book by Alisha Rai and definitely not the last. I loved this romance so much that the minute I finished the book, I started thinking about the sequels and when can I read them too because I’m that hooked.Hate to want you is an adult romance that follows our two main characters; Livvy Kane and Nicholas Chandler who are connected by a tragic pasts that changed their lives and destroyed the connection between their families altering the course of their future together. Despite their history and their feelings, Livvy and Nicholas can’t be together and they settle down for one night of passion each year. But, after nine years of the same arrangements, something changed. And that thing is Livvy coming back home after years of living separate from her family.And now, Livvy and Nicholas can’t escape each other, so what will happen, will they keep on resisting or will they succumb to what they really want. When shit goes down, storybook princes are unreliable. I need a man who's going to stand by my side in the cold light of day I think one of the best thing I loved about this romance is how complex and multi-dimensional it is without it being dramatic. The book starts with the two main characters have gone through a lot of changes in their relationship an it grows and changes even more. They go from two people who were friends to two people in love to two strangers who just sleep together once in a year and then they start to develop feelings again, feelings they though they moved on from. All that growth happens without drama cause even though a lot happens between them, when you look at their history, you find them a little justified in their behaviors and their motivations were clear and made sense. You were hurt. It’s not a weakness to love someone like that. It’s not a weakness to be in pain when that love is ripped away from you. Now as a romanctic couple, I find them really interesting and addictive to read about. The chemistry between them is palpable and the romance believable. You feel the pull they have on each other deeply and you witness they way the affect each other. Their love is deep and real and despite all the denial and the refusal, they can’t escape it because it’s part of them. You can be strong and have moments of incredible despair, when everything feels like it’s collapsing in on you, and yes, when you feel like you want to die. Those moments are not weaknesses. They are simply moments. And they are not you I also loved the side characters a lot. With the exception of Nicholas’ father, he was a jerk, the others were fascinating and they didn’t feel flat. The book also have a diverse cast of characters, the main character and her siblings too is half from Hawaii, half from Japan, her sister in law is muslim from Pakistan and bisexual who’s going to the main character in the second book, I can’t wait to read that one. Society tells women that they have to be responsible for the emotional health of their relationships and then tells them they're weak for feeling emotions. What kind of message is that? Now the romance aside, there were a lot of times that one of the characters will say a lot of thought-provoking statements about womanhood and society, about family and about relationships and second chances and I find that really great and appreciated. There was also a lot of talk about mental health and how people who suffer depression view themselves and how they feel and their thoughts process and I think it was done in a thoughtful way. I guess what I’m trying to say is that this book isn’t only a romance but it talks about family, responsibility, legacies and the pull of the past in ways that make the book feel full and rich without it being too much.I guess this is a romance book that I can recommend without hesitation because it has it all, great characters, a relationship that evolves in a way that we can understand, side characters that you can’t help but root for and a romance that will make you care. ****************************** Enemies To Lovers has always been one of my favorite romantic tropes, I hope This book deliver on that.

Favorite Quote: "You never told me why you decided your car is a woman.""Because no man could ever handle my ass for this long."Alisha Rai has a new series and it's angst-filled from page one. I enjoyed it. I've seen it mentioned that this book is like Romeo and Juliet, except with a happy ending. And that is right on target. We have two enemy families, tragedy, resentment, and secret love.Nicholas Chandler and Livvy Kane grew up together, and their families co-owned a large grocery store chain. Nicholas and Livvy fall in love, but tragedy strikes. Nicholas's mother and Livvy's father were killed in a car crash. No one knows why Nicholas's mother and Livvy's father were in a car together, heading towards a lake house...but this tragedy sets the families on path for a big feud. Blame is thrown at one another. Nicholas's father buys out the Kane family's  shares at an extremely low price and more hatred is fueled. A feud brews and when Nicholas's father demands that Nicholas can no longer see Livvy, or he will bankrupt everyone Nicholas holds dear, he decides to leave Livvy to keep her family safe. And she is devastated.Livvy starts traveling the country, working in various tattoo shops along the way. But once a year - just one day a year - she texts Nicholas coordinates telling him where to meet her. He flys to her, they have sex, and he leaves. This happens except in the tenth year, she doesn't text. Nicholas doesn't know what to do with himself not being able to see her.When Livvy's mom breaks her hip, she goes home to stay with her for a while. Nicholas shows up shortly after - and this is where the book begins and oh boy, do we get some sexual tension with a good dose of angst thrown in.That same spark tingled to life as he walked toward her now, But then she noted how his steps were hesitant, reluctant, and that spark died a swift, fierce death.Because he didn't want to walk toward her. He might crave her body, but that was all he wanted. And he hated himself for it, the same way she hated herself for being unable to control her feelings for him.I've put an entire book's worth of intense family dynamics into one paragraph above so I've glossed over a million things. But - Alisha Rai does a fabulous job of letting the reader have a very intimate look not only into the lives of Nicholas and Livvy, but their families. Their living parents, their siblings. While it took me a minute to get everyone straight, by the end of the book, I felt like I knew them so well. I feel like she writes this book on a very emotionally intense level - and keeps it there the entire book.  Livvy is so, so guarded. She has built up a wall around herself, and does not let anyone in. Not her mother (who has her own wall) not Nicholas, not her brother. Wait - let me mention her brother, Jackson. He left after his father died and no one has seen or heard from him. But then he shows up out of the blue. And he is mysterious, and gruff, and a man of few words. And if Alisha Rai does not let us in his pants ...errr...writes him a book, I will weep.Anyway! Back to the story, Livvy is all tough persona, but crumbling on the inside. She has endured much tragedy in her life, and has had to endure it alone. She fears she will break if she has to give all to Nicholas again. But oh Nicholas. Mr. organized, broody, intense man. He loves running his grocery empire, but his father and him butt heads, a lot. No one has gotten over the death of his mother. His younger sister walks around timid and shy (she also needs a book!). Nicholas has anger but even more - he has a longing for Livvy that made me swoon.Throughout the book these two clash - romantically and then push each other away. Trying to trust, and break down family walls and expose all the secrets they have held on to for so long.Do you like books that end with the hero performing a grand gesture?  Oh do we get that. And even better, the words he says at the end made me smile. My only complaint is that I wish we had an epilogue! These two end with what I consider maybe not a fragile bond - but they have had to work so hard in the book to get to a happy place, and we don't see that happy place until the very end. I wanted to see them a few months down the line. How are they coping with all the stress of their families???Divine angst, intense emotions, and a sexy romance. Well done.Grade: B+

Nuestra reseña en A la cama con... un libro No sé qué esperaba de este libro pero no era lo que me he encontrado, una estupenda historia culebronesca entre dos familias con guarrerismo del bueno y, sorprendentemente, dulce y con mucho amor.

This review was originally posted on Addicted To RomanceHate To Want You is the first book in the Forbidden Hearts series by Alisha Rai. Alisha Rai is a new author for me, and I finally decided that it was time I needed to try this book out especially with how many good things I had heard about this one and I have to say that I am so relieved that I finally picked this book up and LOVED this book to pieces. This is a story that has a similar tone to the shakespeare play "Romeo and Juliet" only you are guaranteed a happy ending.Hate To Want You is a story where we have two hearts that have been divided. Nicholas and Livvy were once high school sweethearts. They knew even while they were so young, how much they loved each other. But when a tradegy struck and their families were divided and became enemies, their love was forbidden. Every year they meet in secret and share in pleasure in each other's arms. Now Livvy has moved back home, set up her tatoo parlour and to be closer to her mother who has had some health problems. Now Nicholas and Livvy are in close proximity with each other. Soon Livvy and Nicholas will need to face up to the secrets of the past and embrace what they have been hiding from everyone including themselves.Hate To Want You is a powerful story, and one that I didn't want to put down. I have a weakness for those "forbidden love" romances and this is at the top of the best I have ever read and most especially in a contemporary setting. This book took me in all forms of directions and feels and sighs. Its a story that is a magnetic force and pulls its readers this way and that way and leaves you needing more of this author and these families and engaging characters. At first I wasn't sure how I would feel about this book. I was pretty nervous about reading it beforehand, especially with the hype it had been getting since being published. I can say though with a certainty that it was worth every moment. In the beginning we see how Livvy and Nicholas truly care about each other, but its too painful for both of them to share their emotions so they release it all in one night every year in the bedroom. But now its different because they are living so close to each other and have to face up to their own pain and frustrations and the true depth of love they share with each other. We see the way they have to face up to their past, and as they do so, their bond with each other really blooms here. I couldn't get enough of seeing the way our hero faces up to his father, and fights for his girl and the way he woos her is swoon worthy. “I’m scared.”“So am I. Let’s be scared together.” We get some fun moments with characters you are guaranteed to fall in love with and people who you can't wait for their stories.Overall Hate To Want You is a delicious tale of heartbreak and loss, but also of courage and strength and the depths of love. Its a vibrant and vividly portrayed romance you can't resist!! [foogallery id="45609"] 

Wow, the 2nd book in my romance reading project was a total knockout! To my admitted surprise, I ended up LOVING this book. I loved and empathized with the main characters so much and was impressed at Rai's talent for dealing with emotional complexities (romantic, familial, and otherwise). This book actually made me cry in TWO places! I was totally shipping these two from the beginning, and the obstacles they had to overcome were very realistic (old family business feud stuff, mostly). Both the hero and the heroine's individual journeys dealing with old trauma were compelling stories in and of themselves too. And their relationships with other characters were multi-layered and well developed. Just all around fantastic characterization. Plus: POC heroine who has depression! Secondary queer characters! Smoking hot sex scenes! 😚 I liked this so much I went out and bought the sequel today!

Hate to Want You by Alisha Rai is the first story in her Forbidden Hearts series, an emotionally angst filled romance of family, friendship, lust, hate, and love. It’s the story of two people caught up in a shared family history that could be their doom or their salvation. To understand their complex relationship, you have to go back to the beginning…Sam Oka and John Chandler were best friends when the second world war separated them. As a Japanese American, Sam was forced to leave his home and reside in an internment camp with his family. John took care of whatever possessions Sam had to leave behind. The forging of their friendship bond from that terrible time led to them starting a chain of grocery stories, C&O, after the war. Their children grew up together, and their grandchildren became best friends too, including Nicholas Chandler and Olivia ‘Livvy’ Kane. Nicholas and Livvy went from friends to teenage lovers easily, never imagining that anything could tear them apart. But then Olivia’s father and Nicholas’s mother died together in a car accident. In the grief stricken aftermath, Nicholas’s father bought out Olivia’s mother’s shares of C&O for a fraction of their worth. C&O became Chandlers after a fire at their flagship store, caused by arson, with Olivia’s brother Jackson as the prime suspect. Nicholas broke things off with Livvy, and from that time on the families did not speak.Except Nicholas couldn’t quite let Livvy go, nor she him. Though Livvy left town, traveling around the country and learning her trade as a tattoo artist, she would text him coordinates once a year on her birthday, for him to meet her for a night of lust filled adventures. No speaking, no resolving of the issues between them, just a night of passionate sex and then 364 days apart. They both hate that they can’t quit each other, and finally, Livvy on her last birthday doesn’t text Nicholas at all and he assumes they are finally done. But then Livvy comes home. Forced to confront their complex feelings about the past, and for each other, can Livvy and Nicholas finally get the happy ending they deserve?This is such a dramatic and emotional story that it will grip you from start to finish. There were some tear filled moments for me during some of the more intense scenes. Neither Livvy nor Nicholas can resist the sexual fire that burns between them now that they are in the same place again, and they are quick to resume their affair, even though they know if will be disastrous should their families find out. Yet, just because they are sleeping together doesn’t mean that they are any closer to being happy. It’s not until they take sex out of the equation and spend time really communicating and sharing their thoughts and feelings that they realize how much time they’ve wasted being apart.Because this is a family based story there are many scenes that involve other family members on both sides. While some want the split to remain, others remember the happier times and want to find a way to move forward. Nicholas and Livvy’s relationship is the key to healing some of the old wounds, not just for themselves but for others as well. There are some interesting secrets that come to light, and while not every past hurt is resolved, the families are definitely moving in the right direction. For Nicholas and Livvy, forgiveness and healing lead to a love stronger than before. Hate to Want You is an emotional, super sexy, and intense forbidden romance that proves love is stronger than hate.This review has been posted at Straight Shootin' Book Reviews: https://straightshootinbookreviews.co...A copy of this story was provided by the publisher via NetGalley for review.

Re-read with the But Do They Bang 2022 Take a (Second) Chance on Me Discord, and my rating/review stands. When will we get a tv show of this delicious series!? I need it. Also Nico being such an inside softie but such a demanding and delicious lover? Holy moley, yes. I miss this Alisha Rai SO MUCH.Livvy and Nicholas meet for an illicit night of sex once a year. There are two rules - one night only, no one can know. Childhood sweethearts, they broke up after a terrible accident and a terrible deal broke their two families apart.After a decade of one nights, Livvy doesn't text Nicholas. When he finds out she has returned to their hometown, passion, temper, and family drama threaten to either finally bring them together or forever end everything.SO GOOD. Ugh. I need to process and will write a better review later.Second Read - ALL THE STARS.I'm so into the Romeo and Juliet, star-crossed lovers, enemies to lovers tropes. Thank you Baz Luhrmann for forever marking adolescent Beth. Alisha Rai grips you from the first pages of this splendid romance. It is highly emotionally charged, erotic yet tender, and so full of a cast of wonderful characters. I re-read this to prepare for Hurts to Love You and I am so happy I did. (view spoiler)[I love that while both Livvie and Nicholas obviously had other lovers, they both had special things they kept sacred to their relationship. I love that Nicholas denied himself BJs because they were too personal, to connected to his feelings for Livvie. I also loved how Livvie used her love of tattooing to put a permanent tribute to every one of her birthdays spent with Nicholas on her body. When they both discover these things, I die. (hide spoiler)]