Me Talk Pretty One Day audiobook

Me talk Pretty one day, David Sedaris Me Talk Pretty One Day, published in 2000, is a bestselling collection of essays by American humorist David Sedaris. The book is separated into two parts. The first part consists of essays about Sedaris’s life before his move to Normandy, France, including his upbringing in suburban Raleigh, North Carolina, his time working odd jobs in New York City, and a visit to New York from a childhood friend and her bumpkinish girlfriend. The second section, "Deux", tells of Sedaris’s move to Normandy with his partner Hugh, often drawing humor from his efforts to live in France without speaking the French language and his frustrated attempts to learn it. Prior to publication, several of the essays were read by the author on the Public Radio International program, This American Life.تاریخ نخستین خوانش: روز بیست و نهم ماه دسامبر سال 2013میلادیعنوان: بالاخره یه روزی قشنگ حرف میزنم؛ اثر دیوید سداریس؛ مترجم: پیمان خاکسار؛ مشخصات نشر تهران، نشر چشمه، 1391؛ در 234ص؛ اندازه 5/21س.م در 5/14س.م، شابک 9786002291134؛ چاپ چهاردهم 1399؛ چاپ شانزدهم 1400؛ موضوع: داستانهای طنزآمیز نویسندگان ایالات متحده آمریکا - سده 21مفهرست: مقدمه مترجم: یک: بتاز کارولینا؛ رویای غول آسا عرضه های کوتوله؛ مهندسی ژنتیک؛ دوازده لحظه در زندگی هنرمند؛ تو نمیتوانی خروس را بکشی؛ جوانان در آسیا؛ منحنی یادگیری؛ پسر گنده؛ جهش بزرگ رو به جلو؛ غذای ویژه ی امروز؛ شهر فرشتگان؛ درخشان مثل الماس؛ ناتکراکر دات کام؛ دو: دوباره دیروز میبینمت؛ بالاخره یک روز قشنگ حرف میزنم؛ جیزز شیوز؛ کرم نوار؛ بکنش دوتا؛ به یاد آوردن کودکی ام در قاره ی افریقا؛ شهر نور در تاریکی؛ من به کیف اعلام وفاداری میکنم؛ جیب بر و جیب بریانی؛ دختره داشت جلو چشمم میمرد؛ آدم با هوش؛ نمایش آخر شب؛ هرچه پوشیده را میخورم؛مجموعه‌ ای از مقاله‌ ها، و یادداشت‌های طنز، اثر «دیوید سداریس»، نویسنده‌ ی «آمریکایی» است؛ جناب «پیمان خاکسار»، در مقدمه‌ ی کتاب، درباره‌ ی رفتن سراغ نویسنده‌ هایی همچون «سداریس»، و معرفی آن‌ها به خوانشگران فارسی‌ زبان، می‌نویسند: (ممکن است با دیدن عناوین بعضی از کتاب‌هایی که ترجمه کرده‌ ام با خودتان بگویید، این نویسنده‌ ها دیگر کیستند؟ شاید پیش خودتان فکر کنید، که خاکسار دوست دارد نویسنده‌ های بی‌ اهمیت و ناشناخته را از تاریک‌ترین کنج‌های ادبیات جهان پیدا کند، و آثارشان را ترجمه کند؛ این‌طور نیست؛ این نویسنده‌ ها مهم‌ هستند؛ شاید مهم‌تر و مشهورتر از کسانی که آثارشان در «ایران»، ترجمه و خوانده می‌شود؛ در دورانی که مخاطب ادبیات بودم، و ترجمه نمی‌کردم، همیشه برایم سئوال بود که چرا هیچ مترجمی سراغ این آثار نمی‌رود؟ شاید همین باعث شد، به ترجمه روی بیاورم، تا نویسنده‌ هایی را که دوستشان داشتم، ولی آثارشان به فارسی ترجمه نشده بود را، به شما معرفی کنم، تا در لذت خواندن‌شان باهم شریک شویم؛ «دیوید سداریس» هم از همین دسته نویسندگان است.) پایان نقلتاریخ بهنگام رسانی 03/07/1399هجری خورشیدی؛ 20/06/1400هجری خورشیدی؛ ا. شربیانی

Ah! My first David Sedaris read--not counting the weird Squirrel book--and I finally understand what all the fuss is about. The humor is so good it's mesmerizing. I'm in awe of his ability to make ordinary life sparkle through such rich narration.There is no mundane task that Sedaris cannot do without dazzling the reader. Anything and everything is cause for social commentary and uproarious observation. From learning to play the guitar to going to the movies to an unusually large turd floating in the toilet, he finds opportunity to poke fun at the world, poke fun at himself, and combine various events into unforgettable knee-slapping comedy.Truly a landmark, I totally get why this book continues to endure nearly 20 years later. It is an instant-classic that belongs just behind Mark Twain, if not--dare I say--in front.

Great way to spend your weekend! Please turn on the audiobook and listen this spectacular, smart, extremely humorous essays! First part consists of author’s life before his move to France. Some snippets from suburban Raleigh/ NC life and moving to big apple, working at bizarre jobs for making ends meet. ( so entertaining)But the second part (in French “ deux”) about moving to Normandy / France with his partner Hugh, adjusting process, his efforts to talk in French and suffering from failures was so much better! I fell down from my couch several times as I laughed too hard. My stomach still hurts! Why didn’t I read the author’s other works before? I highly recommend this amazing read! Especially the audiobook is quite fascinating! A great way to brighten your mood and have an enjoyable Saturday!

Another collection of Sedaris tales as we have come to know and love. His cynical banter and humorous anecdotes shine again. While some might say the same old formula gets old, with Sedaris it is expected and greatly appreciated. (I even heard he changed the formula in a recent book and it was not well received)I listened to the audio and love hearing the words from the mouth of the author. His delivery and timing are perfect - which I suppose is to be expected as they are his words, but not every author can read their words as well as they write. It is great how he can make every mundane activity an entertaining anecdote.If you like a little humorous getaway, check out this and other Sedaris books.

This book has been my tube companion for the past fortnight. It is the perfect accompaniment to the London commute for two reasons:1) The essays are perfectly formed, so you can be assured that you'll be able to finish 3 little chunks over 40 minutes or so. Once the train trundled into Westminster station I would know to quicken my pace so as to finish another section before alighting at Blackfriars and elbowing some bankers.2) My tube line is the epitome of the British stiff upper lip. People's faces remain practically emotionless from Putney to Barking to Richmond and up to High Street Kensington. Of course, scrum tackles take place at each station as people push on during rush hour. But NO emotions pass across the face of a commuter. Apart from perhaps a slight grimace when the new arrival feels it necessary to share all the details of their skiing holiday with the entire carriage. Anyway - to the point! With Sedaris in my hand I have been snorting, honking and smiling as never before seen on the District Line. The 50 something lady who settled into her seat at Wimbledon with the Daily Telegraph looks up nervously. The banker ignoring the opinion section of the FT for the far more fascinating Stocks and shares pages shifts nervously. And then I snort once more. Being in such a cheery mood, once a seat becomes available I offer it to the young lady in slightly uncomfortable looking high heels reading the bible (aka the Metro) thus leaving the assembled masses concerned that I may be clinically insane and yet on their train.

David Sedaris and friendThis loosely autobiographical memoir from humorist David Sedaris is divided into essays, many of which are laugh out loud funny. The topics include Sedaris's childhood rebellion against speech therapy, unwanted guitar lessons taught by a midget, drug fueled (and extended) college years, weird presentations as an untalented performance artist, amusing interactions with his family and friends, living in France with his boyfriend Hugh, and more. I listened to the audio version of the book, narrated by the author, and enjoyed it immensely.Little David Sedaris with his sister Lisa and mother SharonSchool age David Sedaris with his sister AmyCollege age David Sedaris Sedaris's stories may stretch the truth on occasion, but they're very entertaining. For example: As an art major in college, Sedaris took a pottery class: "With their thick clumsy bases my mugs weighed in at close to five pounds each. The color was muddy and the lips rough and uninviting." Sedaris's mother used these 'gifts' as pet bowls until "a cat chipped a tooth and went on a hunger strike."**********After Sedaris graduated from The Art Instutute of Chicago in 1987 he was offered a job teaching a writing workshop. Having no idea how to prepare lesson plans, Sedaris divided the twice weekly, two-hour class into a series of discussion periods including: Celebrity Corner - during which pupils presented gossip about rock bands and movie stars; Feed Bag Forum - where students brought in one-pot recipes (Sedaris had a new crock pot); Pillow Talk - during which students could discuss their private sex lives - or failing that - watch the soap opera 'One Life to Live.' The latter activity was turned into a real writing exercise when the pupils were asked to prepare a 'guessay' about what would happen on the TV show next day. To Sedaris's dismay the attendees came up with things like 'the long lost daughter turns out to be a vampire' or 'Vicky chokes to death on a submarine sandwich.' Later on, when the students were required to submit their own stories Sedaris would type up evaluations like "punctuation never hurt anyone" or "think verbs".....so for the most part he and the students got along. (I can relate to the bad teaching. I had a professor for a class in 'Insect Physiology' that only talked about baseball teams and deparmental gossip. He got canned pretty quickly. 😎) ********** Sedaris doesn't enjoy eating in New York restaurants, partly because his artsy Soho neighborhood "isn't a macaroni salad kind of place" but rather an area where "the world's brightest young talents come to eat racks of corn fed songbirds." Even simple dishes are dressed up: "The meatloaf has been poached in seawater and there are figs in the tuna salad."SongbirdsSedaris notes, "I'd order the skirt steak with a medley of suffocated peaches but I'm put off by the aspirin sauce" and "The sea scallops look good until I'm told they're served in a broth of malt liquor and mummified lichee nuts." Moreover, "The food is always arranged into a senseless vertical tower; it now reaches for the sky, much like the high rise buildings lining our city streets. It's as if the plates were valuable parcels of land and the chef had purchased one small lot, along with unlimited air rights." Onion rings in vertical tower **********Sedaris's friend Alicia from North Carolina came to visit him in New York and brought a friend named Bonnie. Bonnie didn't take to the city because "unfortunately, visiting Americans will find more warmth in Tehran than New York - a city founded on the principles 'us vs. them'." Sedaris observes, "I don't speak Latin but I always assumed the city motto translates into either 'go home' or 'we don't like you either'." **********Sedaris was born in 1956 and the computer revolution took him completely by surprise. He notes, "There were no computers in my high school and the first few times I attempted college people were still counting on their fingers and removing their shoes when the numbers got above ten." Sedaris writes, "I became aware of computers in the mid-1980s when my friends starting sending creepy Christmas newsletters designed to look like tabloids.....titled 'The Herald Family Tribune' and 'Whassup with the Wexlers.' To top it off, his acquaintances started to "send letters composed to look like Chinese takeout menus and the Dead Sea Scrolls."Sedaris writes, "I refuse to have a computer. The harder I'm pressured to use a computer the harder I resist. One by one all my friends have deserted me and fled to the dark side. 'How can I write you if you don't have an email address?' they ask. They talk of their B-trees and disc doctors and then have the nerve to complain when I discuss bowel obstructions at the dinner table." David Sedaris prefers typewriters to computers **********Sedaris's boyfriend Hugh had lived in France for a while, and the partners spent a few summers in Normandy before moving to Paris for several years. Talking about France, Sedaris observes, "My understanding was that no matter what we tried the French would never like us. And that's confusing for an American raised to believe that the people of other countries should be grateful for all the wonderful things we've done for them....."Things like movies that stereotype the people of Europe as bores and petty snobs.....and remarks like, "We saved your ass in World War II'."David Sedaris lived in France for a while David Sedaris and his boyfriend Hugh HamrickDavid Sedaris and Hugh Hamrick**********During Sedaris's first visit to Normandy, his French vocabulary was limited to words like 'ashtray', 'bottleneck', and the phrase 'see you again yesterday.' He made an effort to learn new phrases and "Went from talking like a baby to talking like a hillbilly." In a butcher shop Sedaris asked, "Is them the thoughts of cows?" - pointing to cow brains.....and requested "lambchops with handles." **********In Paris, Sedaris took a French class with other foreign residents. The class was daunting and the teacher was volatile. Sedaris writes, "My only comfort was knowing I was not alone. Huddled in hallways my fellow students and I engaged in conversations normally heard in refugee camps. For example, one student lamented, 'Sometime me cry alone at night' and another responded, 'That be common for I also, but be more strong you. Much work and someday you talk pretty.' In the second month of French classes - during a lesson about holidays - a Muslim student from Morocco asked, 'What is an Easter?' The teacher asked the students to explain. A Polish girl started, 'It is a party for the little boy of God who call hisself Jesus and'......she faltered and her fellow countryman chimed in.....'He call hisself Jesus and he die one day on two morsels of lumber.' According to Sedaris, "The rest of the class jumped in with bits of information that would have given the Pope an aneurysm".....explanations like, "He die one day and then he go above of my head to live with your father'..... and 'He weared of himself the long hair and after he die the first day he come back here for to say hello to the peoples.' ********To help expand his vocabulary, Sedaris's sister Amy sent him the audiobook of 'Pocket Medical French', designed for visiting doctors and nurses. From this gem Sedaris learned "conversational sparklers" like 'remove your dentures and all your jewelry'.....'you now need to deliver the afterbirth'.....and 'could I trouble you for a stool sample' (among others). David's sister Amy is an actress, comedian, and writer********** Sedaris goes on to say, "I never thought much about how Americans were viewed overseas until I came to France and was expected to look and behave in a certain way. About his appearance, Sedaris says, "If I was thin it was because I'd recently lost the extra fifty pounds cushioning the standard American ass".....and "If I was pushy it was typical.....and if I wasn't it was probably due to Prozac." ********** Talking about expenses in France, Sedaris says, "Shortly after moving into my Paris apartment, I noticed a leak in the bathroom and phoned the landlord to say, "The toilet, she cry much of the time." Bathroom repairs cost him $1000.00 for a job that would be $300.00 in the United States. Thus, the author feared a doctor visit would be truly exorbitant. However, an office visit to a French dentist cost only $25.00, so Sedaris felt brave enough to go to an eye doctor. He explained to the optician, "From the time I had five years I have worn of myself some glasses".....and "Then when I had 20 years I said to myself, 'Enough of this. I am tired of something living all the time upon my nose'." Sedaris goes on to say, "I got a new pair of glasses and I'm still adjusting to all the subtle things I've been missing all these years, things like the expressions of disgust that typically cross people's faces when they discover that they're talking to an idiot." ********** Sedaris also muses about food. He notes, "In a French market, in the section devoted to foreign foods, I came across a large can of peanut butter and it broke my heart. Peanut butter is not something you traditonally find in France and I could sense that someone had gone through a great deal of trouble to make this happen. The problem of course, was the can....the items that come in cans are generally the things that you use in one or two sittings, like cat food or baked beans. The French manufacturer obviously had the impression that homesick Americans just sit around with tablespoons and go through a pound of peanut butter in a single afternoon, shoveling it in until they pass out." Sedaris also writes, "In France, I often leaf through cookbooks looking for vocabulary words that might come in handy. That's how I learned the verbs 'to simmer, to dice, and to set aside the beak'." ********** And finally, Sidaris's friend lent him a book called "Imperial Dishes of China." The author observes, "As a working cookbook I felt like it left too many holes. When told to 'arrange the camel paw attractively' my first question was..... how ? Camel paws don't even look attractive on camels. On top of that, where are you supposed to buy these ingredients in the first place? if you can't locate a single camel paw can you use two dozen cat paws instead?" Imperial food of China **********At the end of the book Sedaris talks about moving back into his parents basement when he was between colleges, using drugs, and unemployed. His father told him to leave, and Sedaris assumed it was for the above reasons. However, Sedaris's mother - breaking into sobs - apologetically explained that his father threw him out because he was gay. This made me feel a little sad. **********I'd recommend the book to Sedaris fans and anyone else who likes hilarious memoirs. David Sedaris and friend You can follow my reviews at http://reviewsbybarbsaffer.blogspot.com/

I think this period, right around 2000, a little before and after, is David's best writing era. He seems to be at this best and most funny I think.I love this collection. He has a multitude of stories about living in France with Hue. I love the peak into his experience of France or even NYC for that matter. His family plays a huge role in his stories as usual. I do wonder if he and Hue are still together. I would guess not, simply because he is famous and famous people rarely stick together.He also has a funny story about being a writing teacher. I often wonder what real life would be like for him and how much is exaggerated for his writing or altered to create something funny. I know life is really weird and people strange, so there is probably a lot that happens to him, that is just like he says. This collection had me laughing robustly. I thoroughly enjoyed this collection and I think it is my favorite outside of SantaLand diaries which can't be beat; so far. This tickled my funny bone, so I'm very happy. David is a nice relief from the stress of school right now. I will continue to read more of his stuff.

Incredibly, this is the first Sedaris book I've read, and it more than lives up to the hype.Calling him a humourist doesn't do him justice. Sure, he's read-aloud-to-your-friends funny, but he's also a shrewd social satirist and very, very smart, able to evoke the pain of childhood speech therapy classes, the humiliation of learning French as an adult, or the mortification of finding a huge turd in a friend's toilet (this latter story, by the way, is only in the abridged audio version of the book - I both listened to and read the complete book).A couple of essays seem like filler, but the best – about learning jazz guitar from a little person, or being a drug-addled performance artist, or witnessing a down-home rube’s experience of Manhattan – are vivid, fresh and so casual-sounding you know they took a lot of effort.Sedaris is so brilliant he even makes that overcooked routine – ordering food in a trendy, intimidating New York restaurant – into something genuinely funny.And there's an emotional core to many of these essays too – particularly in ones involving his father, Lou, to whom the book is dedicated.I recommend listening to the author himself read from the audiobook – his unmistakable, somewhat babyish voice adds layers to the text – and then picking up the book later, as I did, to savour the craft.I can’t wait to read more of his books.** UPDATE APRIL 2015: I did read another Sedaris book, the early volume Barrel Fever, but wasn't as impressed **

This is the first book I've read by Sedaris, but I will certainly be picking up more in the future! He writes witty essays about his life, this collection specifically focusing on a period when he moved to Paris and was learning French, with other stories sprinkled in. His writing was funny without trying to be too edgy, punny, or forced. The audiobook is narrated by him, and there's even certain parts of it that are recordings of live readings. I really enjoyed this because you got to hear his delivery of the story, as well as how he interacts with an audience. My only gripe is that the audiobook weirdly omitted some stories that were in my physical copy of the book. Still, all of these were easy and fun to read, not requiring too much brain power, but still offering a good message.

4 high star!Oh, David Sedaris, I had to force myself not move right on to another of your audiobooks. I listened to Calypso a while ago, and I loved it - funny, smart and real. Me Talk Pretty One Day is an older book, and gives me a glimpse at a younger Sedaris, but the humour and view onto himself, his family and the world are recognizable. There are some great stories about teaching a writing class and learning to speak French that I especially loved. Exercising self restraint will give me a chance to savour the books I have not yet listened to. And I suspect there may be a risk of too much a good thing ruining the effect if I listen to them all at once. But once I get through this bleak audio history of The Troubles in Ireland, I’m going right back to Sedaris...

Don’t mind me, just creepily and hysterically laughing out loud by myself

I thought Sedaris was funny in writing, but he's even funnier when he's delivering his own material aloud. I could've done without the live recordings of some parts, though. They sounded like the laugh track on a 90s sitcom, and the material can stand just fine on its own.