Bite Me If You Can audiobook

One of my very favorite things in books is when something or someone not human is trying to "human". If it's written correctly, it will always be funny and endearing. This story did a good job with it. Lucian is over 2,000 years old and really has no idea. He lost his humanity so long ago that he doesn't even know it's gone. Well... doesn't care. If not giving a shit was money, he'd be a billionaire. Wait, that's not my favorite analogy. Money is fine, but still. Okay, if not giving a shit was chocolate, he'd be my favorite person ever.mmmm.... chocolate....Lucian gets stuck taking care of a newbie vampire, Leigh, and he treats her like an unwanted red-headed step-child at first. He literally puts in ear plugs while she is screaming in pain so that he'll be more comfortable. He also tries to feed her dog food because he has no idea that people won't eat it. It's food, right? In other words, he's a heartless bastard. I like him.The problem is that Leigh likes Lucian and he starts to like her too. It's like his heart grew three sizes that day, ala Grinch. Well... something grew. “Are you talking to my penis?” Lucian asked with disbelief. “It talked to me first,” she said defensively, and frowned. “You didn’t mention this little skill.” Lucian decided she must be joking and laughed. “So, what did it say?” “It said, ‘Lucian? Lucian, are you there?’” He blinked. “Why would it say that?” “I don’t know. It’s your penis.”That’s when he recalled the cell phone in his pocket. Modern women.... we'll anthropomorphize everything. (Look it up)It's not like men do that. They never name their penis. That would be weird. The Penis Name Book: A Guide to Naming Man's Best FriendThat's right. There are even name books for the peen. This book has a 4.5 rating here on goodreads.Obviously, this is serious business. Also, just remember when you are thinking of writing a book and wonder if you could ever get published: someone published this. Anyway, enough penis talk. I can't believe you guys are making me talk about something so embarrassing!This book was one of the better ones of the series. There were plenty of laughs and both of the main characters were likable.

This story centres on Lucian, the twin brother of Jean-Claude, Marguerite's deceased husband (making Lucian the uncle of Lucern etc.). He's one of the "original" immortals, and has lived for over two thousand years. He's on the Council and hunts down rogue vampires. It's while he's on the hunt for another ancient vampire, Morgan, who has started his own "nest", that he encounters Leigh. Morgan has just turned her but she hasn't yet gone through the painful process when Lucian grudgingly rescues her.He's not happy about it, though. He tries to dump her on Margeurite but she's off to Europe, leaving him at her home in Toronto with her massive mastiff Julius. He can't get any of his relatives to help him except to offer advice he doesn't want to hear, and it doesn't help that they all think Leigh is his life mate and he hasn't been laid since Alexander the Great's wedding.And on top of all that, Morgan's coming for Leigh.This is more serious in tone than some of the others in this series, but it still has moments of making me laugh out loud. Lucian, the sexy beast, is now my favourite Argeneau vampire, and I will quite happily be re-reading this one!

If you've read through the first 5 books of this Series then you know that Lucian is.. well.. a grump to say the least. He is one of the oldest immortals and he is hanging on by a thread from turning Rogue like so many before him. Lucian is out hunting, hunting rogue vampires that is, when Leigh is thrown into his lap. Leigh is a bar owner who just happens to be in the wrong place, at the wrong time and has hired the wrong type of employees. The combination of the two is just incredibly funny. Lucian this big old bad ass all of a sudden in charge of handling Leighs change WITHOUT the assistance of anyone. His orginal plan was to dump her into Marguerites lap. Upon his arrival he quickly finds not only is Marguerite unavailable but every other member of the family is unvailable. There are some really hilarious scenes in this book. It was one of the funniest books of the series to date. Melissa Reviewer for 1000 + Books to Read

I love Lucian and Leigh as a couple. One, because Lucian turned out to be the marshmallow Rachell called him, of course after trying to dump the poor woman on everyone he could get his hands on. Two, Leigh wasn't the snippy crying woman you'd expect a newly turned and almost rogue vampire to be. As she is always described, she was he peaceful self all along. And perhaps that's what makes her perfect for Lucian. Him being the enforcer and oldest and cruelst, he needs a little peace and smiles and all those in his home. And she can kick ass. Bonus points.

Irealy enjoyed this book!!!! it was funny and Lucian became my favorite male character..... he is so protective of his family and you'll find out why... Since he is an older vamp he is able to block his thoughts but when he meets his lifemate he lets loose and the family attacks his thougths TOO FUNNY... I WOULD READY THIS AGAIN

so fun and it makes you laugh yet fast paced

I adore, Lucian Argeneau, hunter of rogue vampires, and his abrasive personality. Lucian lost his lifemate, and daughters when the destruction of Atlantis happen. A thousand, and more years later, Lucian get's a second chance at love, and having a modern day lifemate. It was so nice to see Lucian, and Liv find there way to each other.

Lucian! Lucian! Lucian! ❤ ❤ ❤ He is my favorite grumpy old immortal! I loved reading his story! Watching this ancient one getting struck with cupid's arrows is enjoyable! Leigh is just perfect for Lucian.Re-Read: 12/2019

I love Lucian!

Another good book from this very long series. You can read any of these in any order really-makes no difference. I had been wanting to see Lucian get his happily ever after and this is it. I listened and had it done in one day. Narration got 4 stars from me. The whole thing kept me entertained and I’m glad I decided to listen to it. Recommended to adult readers of paranormal romance. Fun listen as usual!